Ahithophel: The Man who knew it all.

 

Image by Bible Art

    Ahithophel has always been painted as a villain; the bad guy who betrayed King David and supported his son Absalom in the rebellion to take the throne. We have even turned his story into a prayer point, rebuking every spirit of Ahithophel from our lives. It may be valid since no one wants the person who betrays them to get away with it or for the enemy’s plan to succeed. However, the Bible in 2^nd Samuel 16 verse 23 says “Now in those days the advice Ahithophel gave was like that of one who inquires of God. That was how both David and Absalom regarded all Ahithophel’s advice.” He was wise, and his advice was always good so what made him a bad man?

I read an analysis of Ahithophel’s life describing him as a straight thinker, practical, extremely wise, and never opposed. His words commanded immediate action. When he betrayed David and supported his son, it possibly wasn’t a personal attack or emotional decision, it was a logical choice based on his calculations of the outcome of the events. The Bible says Absalom sent for Ahithophel the Gilonite, David’s counselor so it can be assumed that he felt it was time to serve as counselor to a younger king which was better for the country. Though his first advice to Absalom was vile, (which revealed his hypocritical heart) he was giving a factual strategy that would sway the people and strengthen Absalom as king. But when Absalom whom he proudly supported, publicly rejected his counsel, Ahithophel didn’t know how to act, and the humiliation drove him to his death.

The Bible doesn’t give much detail apart from being the king’s advisor, a job he was clearly good at and had become his identity. So, when he felt he had failed, what else was there for him to do? Be a retired advisor to the king? How does that work? In what quarters would he be able to show his face? Since he felt that was the end of him, he went home and killed himself. The Bible in 2^nd Samuel 17 verse 23 says, “When Ahithophel saw that his advice had not been followed, he saddled his donkey and set out for his house in his hometown. He put his house in order and then hanged himself. So, he died and was buried in his father’s tomb.” Another version says, “he set his affairs in order….” Even at the end of his life, Ahiphotel was practical, organized, and didn’t want anyone else in his dealings.

Something happened to me recently that completely bruised my ego, it was painful, and I saw myself recoil from any form of human interaction for the next few minutes. I even caught myself canceling everyone who had a part in the disgrace and how I would stay away from them forever. Thankfully, I have learned to listen to the Holy Spirit when he nudges or speaks so I felt it hard when he brought Ahithophel’s story to mind as I sulked.

At one point, you have been Ahithophel! If you are reading this then shame hasn’t driven you to end your life (which I thank God for) but how many times have you blown a little situation out of proportion because you were ashamed, or your ego was bruised? How many times have you walked away from a friendship, a partner, a deal, a client, or asking for what you want because you didn’t give a second chance to yourself, the situation, or the person? How often have you concluded that there is no recovery from your failure, and you have reached the end of the rope? How many times have you glorified your own wisdom, beauty, or talents, despising others for their lack of or when they questioned you? How many times have you been a weapon someone else had to pray against because you were oppressive with your power, or condescending?

Just like Ahithophel, the disgrace I faced was a case of pride that comes before a fall; I had convinced myself I knew too much, and in my overconfidence, I completely misunderstood what was being asked in a presentation and ended up talking nonsense. The truth is that when I calmed down, the situation wasn’t that bad, and I am glad I didn’t lash out at anyone. I knew it affected my demeanor – I went from being the person whose work was always accepted, who never made a mistake, to one who made a mistake publicly. In Nigerian parlance, it's over-kaku that almost killed me!

Ahithophel’s advice was not bad because the Bible said so. Hushai was sent to delay Absalom’s plans and not to kill anyone. Yes, God was fighting on David’s side and granted his petition to turn “Ahithophel’s counsel into foolishness” (2^nd Samuel 15 verse 31) however Ahithophel finished the plan by killing himself because in his usual pragmatic approach, rejection + disgrace = death. Rabbinical literature captures Ahithophel as a proud man, this same pride that led him to his death.

Please learn to catch yourself whenever you desire to be the center or the one whose opinion stands. Not every straight-thinking process is a solution; be gentle with yourself and others. Jeremiah 9 verse 23 says “Let not the wise boast of their wisdom or the strong boast of their strength or the rich boast of their riches….” Ask The Holy Spirit to guide your thoughts, help you ‘mix’ grace in your intelligence, and give you godly wisdom (James 1 verse 5, James 3 verse 17).

Be Prepared, Stay Ready

 

Image from stonedcampbelldisciple.com

I have always known the Boys Scout motto as “Be Prepared”, and while it is easy to assume its simple meaning as always being ready, out of curiosity, I googled it to know the organization’s true intent. According to the first chief scout of the movement, Lieut. Gen. Baden Powell C.B. The motto means to always be in “a state of readiness in mind and body to do your duty. To have disciplined yourself to be obedient to every order, and by having thought out beforehand any accident or situation that might occur, so that you know the right thing to do at the right moment and are willing to do it.”

When I read this description, the picture that came to mind was the prophetess Huldah. She was mentioned only twice in the Bible in 2^nd Kings 22 and 2^nd Chronicles 34, and it was the same story told twice. She was a prophet, and some theology says she was the wife of the keeper of the king’s wardrobe. It's safe to assume Huldah had her heart stayed on God’s Word because when King Josiah wanted to know what The Lord was saying, he sent men to inquire, and these men went to Huldah. She immediately answered them with “Thus says the Lord God……” and her words helped the king to repent and destroy idolatry in Judah.

This event is remarkable for me because females were not often publicly regarded in such positions in this era, but the men sent by the king to inquire of The Lord knew she was the one to go to for answers. There were no mentions of Huldah before this event, she wasn’t in the spotlight, dwelled in Jerusalem, and was supposedly always in the temple but they sought her out for the answers they needed.  

The Bible does not specify that they waited days to get her response, when the men came to her for answers, she boldly confirmed God’s word. Huldah stayed knowing the heart of God on matters that directly concerned her or others. Most of us can fall into the trap of being selfish with our prayers, it is not a sin or an intentional action, life happens, and we are stuck on seeking God’s help or opinion about a situation we find ourselves in but as children of God, He will sometimes speak to us or take us through an experience which will be primarily for and about others. Huldah most likely prayed for her country because the king wanted to know God’s decision for the nation and that’s what she told them.

Recently I was speaking to a friend, I do not even recall what led to that topic, but I remember being led to tell him that as Christians we need to learn to sit at the fountain, and not just come occasionally to drink water when we get thirsty. Our Christian walk is a way of life, not a performance. We don’t take off the clothes of holiness to do regular non-spiritual activities. Even in our state of rest or doing mundane activities like eating, chatting with friends, and exercising, God can still reach us, so we must remain in tune with Him and be ready to do what is required.

The message Huldah gave the men who came to her did not just get downloaded into her spirit when they arrived at her place. She knew God’s Word and intentions long before she was asked. I even imagined she may not have been praying when they got to her, the Bible didn’t specify anything about that, but I believe she stayed ready. Just like the scout’s movement says, Huldah was always in a state of readiness in mind and body to do her duty of obeying God. She remained disciplined in every season, she wasn’t caught by surprise, she was willing and did the right thing when the moment came.

I pray we all learn from Prophet Huldah’s life and be prepared for what God wants of us. We should ask Him to help us be open and ready always.

The Reluctant Royal

 

Image from Wikipedia

Ish-Bosheth was King Saul’s fourth son who held the throne for about 2 years after his father and brothers died in battle. Though he held the title, the one who truly had the reins of power was Abner, his uncle, and Commander of the Army. When I read about Ish-Bosheth, what I feel is pity. No one really thinks of or talks about him, besides the few scriptures that describe his experience and death, he isn’t a character we look to emulate. However, can we blame him?

Ish-Bosheth was royalty but not necessarily an heir to the throne, even if God hadn’t moved the Kingship from his family to that of David, he still would not have been king because he had older brothers who were stronger, wiser, and trained for leadership. In 2^nd Samuel 4, he was described to have “lost heart, and all Israel was troubled” after the news of Abner’s death reached him. This showed he was a man who did not like difficulties and was satisfied being in the shadows, hiding at home in times of war, and letting someone else make the tough decisions. It was not hidden knowledge to the nation that he had no strength, even his supposed enemy David acknowledged him as an innocent man.

As a prince, one would have expectations of Ish-Bosheth, but I thought about how family dynamics show up in our lives and if we have any control over it. Not much was said about his upbringing but looking at Saul’s life and stories about kings in those days, we can assume he was neglected, or was expected to be aware because of all he was privy to! Sadly, he also did nothing to make himself better or stronger.

Being Saul’s son held no benefit for him. This emphasizes my constant thought about the non-tangible things we leave for our children to inherit. We rarely think deeply about the effects of our ‘existence’ on our loved ones. Saul probably assumed being king was good enough for his children, I mean being the king's child is hardly a bad idea but sometimes, what we consider good is not the answer to queries your loved ones have.

I promise you that I am not blaming Saul, but lately, I have been burdened with the power of influence by our families and environment in our formative years, and how the person we had to become then impacts who we are as we get older. I constantly feel like I should do better for those coming or growing up around me.

If Ish-Bosheth knew better and was bold enough to refuse the throne, accepting David had already been ordained king perhaps he might have prevented the death of innocent lives lost unnecessarily in battle in the years he was king. Or he might not have been killed and instead shown mercy by David. He died in his home, stabbed, and beheaded by two of his tribesmen, for the simple reason that they believed murdering him would get them favor with David. His 42 years seemed to dissolve like smoke; beyond a few sentences, we know nothing more. It feels like he was a pawn in such a grand game, yet he was royalty. To show he was just a poor guy trying to mind his business, even David called him an innocent man and avenged his death.

We encounter people like Ish-Bosheth in our environment; those we judge doomed, weak, or too shy to stand up for themselves, those with different abilities from what we consider normal, and those who genuinely have never been taught to be and do better. We must be kind! It is not always easy, but it is our responsibility to humanity. Some may argue that Saul’s family was already canceled or hopeless but Mephibosheth, Saul’s grandson enjoyed mercy and prosperity from David. God doesn’t object to kindness (Galatians 5:22 -23) so embrace and spread it. And if they deserve punishment, let God sort them out.

The Quiet Characters

 

My Book of Bible Stories by JW.org

I have used a particular devotional book since 2008, it was a souvenir at a wedding, and I believe that is the best gift I have received for attending someone’s event. It is a book about Bible characters, and it resonates so strongly because I appreciate storytelling; I learn better when I can read, imagine, and take the time to assimilate. Also, the characters are so relatable – flawed and human who made it into the Bible to teach us multiple lessons.

I became curious about some characters mentioned in the book and decided to research their lives and what motivated their most significant actions or inactions. Through the years of reading about these characters, I learn new and different things every time.

A few months ago, I felt the nudge to share lessons The Holy Spirit shows me from the lives of some of these characters. I was reminded about how much reading books like my book of Bible stories as a child and sitting in Sunday school, made an impact. Learning about Enoch, Abraham, Joseph, Mary, and more are priceless lessons I still hold on to and apply in my life. It took a while for me to sit with this thought and know how to go about it. I knew I did not want to repeat the characters or stories that were already well-known, I also considered focusing only on female characters. But today as I read about Ishbosheth, I heard the words ‘Quiet Characters’ and knew what to do.

So begins my series on quiet characters of the Bible: some of which were probably mentioned only once or twice or may not have been considered profound in ways we are familiar with. However, one or more things about them jump at me, and God leads me to share. Since reading about him gave me the kick needed to stop procrastinating, I would begin the series with Ishbosheth.

See you next week.

What do you do when you get what you prayed for?

 

Image from NorthStar Church website

One of my favorite and most relatable Bible characters is a lady called Rhoda. In Acts chapter 12, she joined other Christians to pray that Peter be released from jail. When an Angel set Peter free from prison and he showed up at the house where the Christians were gathered, she was the one who came to the door when he knocked and instead of opening it, she ran away to tell the others. The first time I recall having a 'Rhoda moment', I wondered why I was shocked I received what I had been waiting for.

It’s easy to attribute it to a lack of faith but I realize that while I believe I will get what I want, I feel inadequate to handle it when it comes to me; sort of a fear of how to handle this new thing. What if I can’t maintain this good thing that has come, and I must revert to old ways of lack or life without this gift?

Recently, something I had prayed for and worked hard for came through just as I wanted. I was so stunned; I didn’t talk about it to anyone for a while. I kept checking to reconfirm it was mine. I then began to worry about the changes I would need to make to keep what I had been given. Let me tell you that letting go of the familiar is HARD; I had spent years in a routine that worked for me, and suddenly my boat was being rocked.

I had to admit that life as I operated it would not work for this new gift; I suddenly felt like I had failed. After weeks of sulking, fighting mental battles, and going back to beg God, I was reminded by a friend to be Grateful. Such a common idea, right? Imagine how foolish I felt. And how could I believe I had failed at something I had never done before?

I began to feel better and made a conscious effort to focus on the following:

• No matter how low I feel, I would immediately counter with gratitude, immediately! Trust me, this is an intense mental battle.
• Remember that this was a gift, and my true appreciation would be me stepping up to becoming who I need to be to succeed at this. I may not know how to navigate right now, but I won’t stand in my way so I will learn all I need to.
• Remind me that I deserve this and even when I don’t feel deserving, I have been given anyway so why not just enjoy it? It is alright for me to enjoy good things too.

I am still on the journey to believing I deserve the good I desire, I am thankful for the resilience and discipline to keep going, and I look forward to more Rhoda moments.

Make it to Me

 

A friend once said that life is a stress test. It resonated because he perfectly put the words to how I felt then and how I feel lately. There is always so much going on I often wonder if this is how life should be.

One thing that sticks out the most is how much this affects who I am – my personality, my priorities, my relationships, and my dreams. I look back at who I was years ago, and while I am grateful for some degree of growth, I cannot help but think about all I have lost to be who I am now. 

I think, throughout our lives, we will get to be so many different people in one person. Some tiny parts of your ‘prototype’ can remain as you move forward, while other parts can get lost, and you completely forget you once lived that life.

Through these versions, I have learned to be aware; I ask questions. I mainly ask God, I ask (spelled as judge) myself, and sometimes I have asked those I believed will be honest. At every point, whether I received an answer or not, I am convinced I am not yet who I am.

I am not one to coast therefore, the mental bustle to figure things out can get exhausting. I want to know if there are things I need to do or not. I want to be sure I am not wasting time by making mistakes I cannot recover from. There is also the fear that regardless of my efforts, I may regrettably not make it to who I should be. I think the stress we deal with daily has two purposes – I can either navigate it to help me find my way to myself or to allow the troubles to drift me further away from me (who I should be)

I get reminded that I cannot truly control this journey; I can trust God because He knows what He is doing. Yet, I am convinced I have a part to play- it is my responsibility to make it to me. I have learned that we need to do that every single day – there is no destination of completeness (only in death).

I have experienced that it is easy to get overwhelmed, so we begin to settle for activities that offer temporary relief from what we consider troubles. But these are distractions. These supposed stressful experiences are one of the tools that carve us into the mold we can be. We cannot keep getting in the way and expect things will get or feel better. I used to be so stressed out about why everything requires so much effort until I heard someone say, ‘Effort is the path to mastery’. You cannot know how to handle what you don’t deal with – you only become good at what you do. 

Daily, (even when I have a meltdown) I practice how to have a better outlook on life and to consistently work with the mindset that no matter what, I am being led on a positive path to constantly unfolding a better version of myself. Who we become is not just for personal gain; our lights will inevitably shine for others to partake of. I would very much like to be involved in that process intentionally and maybe even allow myself to look back sometimes and enjoy it. I want to be strong yet soft; I no longer want to be hard and stuck on how difficult things can be.

I pray for direction and the courage to not waste opportunities, and to not try to escape from what I ought to be doing to get me to the version I need to be per time.

Back to Writing and I am Grateful

 

I feel like I betrayed myself for not writing as long as I did. I have so many half-written pieces on my devices, but after months of procrastinating, I am back AGAIN!

I have no plans to be deep- I just want to write and put my thoughts on paper – to feel like I am pulling and loosening the ball of thread inside me. I will write because I enjoy it; I can only get better at writing if I keep writing; therapy reiterated it; and maybe there will be lessons that will be someone’s cup of tea.

So, I resume here on a happy note: focusing on things I am grateful for. About a month ago, I was contemplating if I am genuinely appreciative. If someone did something for me, I would be truly grateful (and mostly shocked that something was given to or done for me). However, I hardly stop to intentionally express gratitude for the seemingly little things that may or may not include others.

Toast-Bread: One early afternoon, I attempted to make myself brunch and decided to toast my bread. While I waited for what I had on the burner to be ready, I dipped a piece of my toast bread in a leftover veggie stir fry before taking a bite, and no jokes, the thought that crossed my mind was “the person who discovered that we could toast bread deserves to be in heaven!” – I mean it is only fair that they are. Yes, I am truly grateful for Toast Bread.

Dry clean floors: this is why bleach is one of my favorite things.

Freshly done pedicure: this is a love language on its own.

Dark chocolate bar: I almost can’t enjoy any other type of chocolate.

Amala when I am hungry and really craving it. The stew was cooked on coal so it has that wood aroma but is so tasty with countless pieces of soft meat. I am eating in amazement and joy, thinking “God what manner of enjoyment is this!”

When I sleep soundly without dreaming or waking up several times (if you have any form of sleep challenges like me, you will understand this)

Full Yoruba Owambe: when I am close to the host so that my table is flowing with milk and honey. The live band must have rehearsed with angels because what is this Heaven-approved praise music making my head swell?

Navy Blue – the color. Just know this color will play a part in my wedding.

Hitting a PR at the Gym: I am looking at this weight and wondering whose hulk Hogan uncle will lift it and then I actually complete the set without breaking a bone or convulsing. The Pride!!

Laughing with my sibling(s): On the night of my father’s funeral, I sat with my siblings and a few loved ones outside the hotel we lodged. We were eating and having a great conversation about everything, and smack in the middle of a laugh, I looked up and realized I was extremely grateful, I almost cried! And then I recognized that there had been other moments like that where life is being what it is; I may be having just a momentary laugh and I would suddenly see that God is good to me because I can still laugh genuinely. Amid pain- something CAN be funny!

Writing: when I start and finish something.

So, cheers to me writing more and may we always recognize things to be grateful for.