So I hate escalators, yes I do
Regardless of how many times I appear to
gracefully get on and off it, I will never like it
My first reason for this hatred- it encourages
laziness. Abeg why does a staircase have to move?
That is why it is ‘step’ you take steps not
stand and get moved up or down, then just take the elevator!
Then, Escalators always have a way of making me feel
incompetent (wait, don’t laugh)
So a week ago I was at the airport and while I
was on the line to get my boarding pass, I noticed a particular guy behind kept
trying to make conversation, “Have you got your ticket?”, “Is this line for
Abuja?”, “What time is the flight?”
“Oga abeg free me!”, I was tired from lack of
sleep and I had a cold threatening to make my nose and head explode, all I
needed was to be well not a married man (yes I checked) disturbing my peace.
So I don’t understand how the man ended up right
in front of me again oh as I was about to get on the escalator (which I have
acquired the perfect habit of being the last person within view to get on), he
was forming gentleman so he smiles and gestures for me to go ahead of him.
Na so my leg hook on the first step – I promise
I can’t explain what happened and I know I will never be able to explain it to
any human being.
“Choi, this man will say so upon how this babe
fine reach she no sabi climb escalator!”
I was clearly ashamed so I just lock up and
started forming arranging myself and tinz.
As my Father in heaven and Friend in time of
need would permit, I see an old school mate passing by, I swiftly call out her
name to go say hi and we walk happily together to the gate.
Thankfully, that was the end of the man and his
judgmental thoughts of how I can’t use that confidence killing machine.
Well the tragic ordeal kept playing in my mind
even as I was trying to sleep, I confess I’ve had my share of good laughs at
people who ‘appeared all ready to conquer only to disgracefully fall’ on the
escalator, LOL. I also wondered why something as insignificant as an escalator
could gravely affect a person’s ‘appearance’ of being competent or why people
paid any attention to that sort of thing.
It crossed my mind, that maybe it can be likened
to an abusive relationship- that slowly but surely kills your confidence- which
often starts with a good mood day, you slowly go up until you get to the top
and then trip on a seemingly small thing which triggers insults and wicked
finger-pointing laughter that inevitably kills all the self confidence you may
have built from the last time you had this experience. And in a few seconds you
are back to that place of being afraid to be seen in public.
But the cool thing is we have options, you can
choose to use an elevator or the staircase. Yeah, it’s not easy to change that
which you’re familiar with but would you wait till you’ve lost a few teeth or
bruised your eye before you know you’ll change? Remember I said the escalator encourages
laziness, just maybe you’ve become too comfortable or believe you’ll eventually
master the art or you just don’t want to do the work of walking to another
elevation device.
Whatever the issue, think about it and GET TO
STEPPING!
As for me and my friend Kellie (who has her own
escalator tales) we shall be taking the staircase when the elevator is wasting
our time *wink*
***And
just for trips, please Google ‘funny escalator cartoons’
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