I have never been that person…
Even when I was young and I was allowed to play, I
didn’t
I am not the girl you keep at the phone waiting for
no reason just to receive your call.
I am not the girl who you say ‘A’ to and act out
‘B’
I am not the one you keep waiting.
You do not try to push butterflies down my throat,
into my stomach and then make me vomit them.
I am not the one you keep guessing because you
will be disappointed.
It may seem like I am playing along but I am
watching silently while you teach me the art
So by the time another of your kind comes along,
he doesn’t even need to speak before I know what he is made of.
I am not the girl whose love you awaken or trust
you claim to want and then can’t handle it when I give you a preview.
I do not know in between; I swing between ‘I like
you’ and ‘I have no regard for your existence’
This comes in varying degrees but never a perfect
blend to accept your idiocy.
I have a low threshold for deceit regardless of
who is trying to dish it out to me.
I do not hold a grudge if you genuinely have no
interest in what I am about
But darling do not feel the need to hold on to my
precious time just to massage your ego, you may end up hurt!
I am alone not lonely and I didn’t ask for your
help!
I am awesome……a beautiful expression of the good
in your life.
I am peace…….bringing calm, joy and a break from
your chaos.
I am solid…….the unwavering solace you fall back
to when you are in over your head.
I am magnificent……appealing, warming your senses,
fanning your flames.
I am wisdom…..protecting your throne as King.
I am the armour bearer……covering your vulnerability,
fighting your demons.
I am NOT the one to mess with, do not pervert my
powers.
I will always flow with life yet do not feel the
need to make the job of tending harder for he who is worthy.
I did not offer you anything, you came to seek and
I convinced myself you were deserving of the gifts.
I am not your mother; you did not come to me as a
child therefore I have no responsibility to nurse you.
I am willing to share but kindly grow up and earn
these blessings; we do not cast pearls to swine or wear diamonds on children.
So get serious, MAN UP or piss off!!! Thank you
very much.
