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Friday, 11 December 2015

Hey you


You need to get it together; because there is nowhere else to go but up
Aren’t you tired of being down? What else is down there for you?
No one understands again because they all got up and left you there.
You forget so easily and that is your greatest problem; your mind….
And how you allow yourself believe so many lies.
No force in this universe is on your side until you show who the boss is.
You think ‘they’ are considerate of how much you have going on? Trust me if you succumb to the pressure and give up, that works just fine because that’s one less great person to deal with.

Learn to mend yourself because nothing external can fix you; it starts from within.
DECIDE to have Courage! That’s the foundation for consistency.
In spite of fear, challenges and setbacks, GET BACK IN THE LANE!
What do you think you are here for? Why do you think you haven’t taken your last breathe?
There is MORE than how you feel right now.
Why are you waiting for help? It won’t come because you don’t need it,
You need to stop being sorry for yourself and rise out of your head.

Adversity will come; people will take you for a fool sometimes because your heart is good; they will steal from you under the guise of familiarity; they will say and do things that hurt; they will leave you and with all your good intentions you may sometimes reap evil instead.

But STAND; Stand STILL and be SURE of who you are,
Because you are ENOUGH!
You are ENOUGH; good the way you are and it is NO fault of yours when people behave badly, it is a reflection of themselves and their experiences and NOT yours so you don’t have to deal with that. Your looks, your knowledge, your laughter, your talent, your heart is and will be enough; not for everybody though but be aware and accept that it is enough.
Some people will never like you or accept you and that is FINE! This is painful especially since you may like them, or trust them or believed they have something to offer you; male or female relationships?! Let it go if it is causing stress and not peace or progress.

Regardless of what you experience do NOT be selfish, greedy or inconsiderate; they are some of the worst flaws and do NOT make you feel better about yourself.
Be careful how you make people feel; you may genuinely be better than them but only because you are to help them! Never feel the need to make fun of others or make them feel less than they are; NO ONE including you on your most confident day likes to feel or be treated low or with no regard.

And ‘learn’ how to forgive…..I say learn because I know this is one of the hardest things to do. Most of the time we think we have forgiven a hurt but we haven’t so we let go of people but not let go of the events when it should be the other way round. Also learn to forgive yourself, because everything you did you knew, and your choices brought you to where you are now but as long as it didn’t kill you then you have been blessed with the chance to fix or change things.

Contentment and prudence are keys to peace when it comes to finance and material things; I’m not saying you shouldn’t desire more but beyond self-comfort, understand your motive.
There is no greater magnet for MORE than Gratitude: even the universe will fight in your favor when you constantly express sincere gratitude for ALL you already have.


There will be more to learn simply because your experiences will make more lasting impressions than my words……..and when that still, sure, all-knowing voice speaks please listen, HE is never wrong, never! HE doesn’t even know how to be. 

Monday, 19 October 2015

Equation or Experience?



“……It is only in the mysterious equations of love that any logic or reasons can be found……” John Nash


I doubt that I have ever been in love, in retrospect maybe I have been in lust, or in complete delusion, but not sure about love. I mean I don’t exactly fancy anyone I have dated in the past so is it possible that the ‘Love’ I had for them died? Does love die?! Well that is conversation for another day.

I blame this on the fact that I am yet to adequately receive or understand love for what it truly is.

The quote above is from ‘A Beautiful Mind’ a movie about the life of 1994 Nobel Prize in Economics winner, John Nash; I think you should google/YouTube his speech at the end of the movie when he made that statement; for me I gathered that HIS experiences made him conclude that Love, though mysterious and unexplainable actually gives balance and essence to life (and maybe validation for all our hard work).

I wrote ‘HIS’ in capital letter because it was a personal conviction moulded by life’s trials and tests which he survived because he had and experienced LOVE; Love had been a solution, soothing his fears and helping him fight his demons. Love was a first-hand experience of peace after the storm, provider of strength in his weakness and cheerleader when his self-esteem was below zero.

It did not need to be heart racing, stomach twisting, every day beautiful and rosy, we-need-to-breathe-eachother-kind; it was simply an Anchor, a Companion at ALL times- Good and Bad!

I believe in Respect, Friendship, Trust and Commitment; I once told a group of people that I didn’t need to be in love to get married. All but one person thought I was crazy and was only saying that because I was ignorant or cynical. Well I stated my case and we all agreed to disagree.

I’ve seen too many victims of love; and before you start helping me imagine how I have lived a bitter life, no thank you very much, I have had my fair share of disappointments however I am not in any way an ‘angry woman’ rather one open to learn and develop a healthy understanding. I genuinely do not want a perverted view of what I will be sharing with one person for the rest of my life- that’s too long a time to be miserable.

Some may argue that well the character of study here didn’t have all the ‘wisdom’ at the beginning of his marriage/relationship, yes I know but I can bet his partner was already a great supporter, she showed respect for him, was committed to what they shared and she also had faith and believed in him and THEM (mutually and as individuals).

I don’t believe in you waiting for another human being to bring all the solutions to your problems but when you decide to be with someone, definitely you do not want to take a leap into sinking sand; No matter your partner’s own convictions and background, they should bring some level of peace and not stress to the life you intend to share. 

Like I never fail to say, I don’t have all the answers but I try to keep an open mind and my few years interacting with humans have taught me that you can’t make choices based on the butterflies in your stomach because they will die; I have seen that people change; I have seen people genuinely believe they loved someone but didn’t; that most of us are selfish and indecisive and inconsiderate of the consequences of our actions on other’s hearts; that there is a popular expectation/image by the world of what love is however this is the death of most of us and that though there are no rules, we are ever led by our intuitions and innate convictions in matters of the heart yet often fail to listen.


**I genuinely hope we have the courage to follow through when we are shown what to do – in relationships and all life’s events.


**Your opinions matter (most times) so kindly comment ; ) Thanks

Friday, 31 July 2015

I had ice cream yesterday


……and the day before that
 

What makes this information special is because I’m trying to be on a diet and I’ve built a slow yet steady healthy pattern for a while

But I failed the past days- no form of exercise and I piled on the calories

I have an excuse – it started with a bad day…..

It was more like a series of unfortunate events and rather than vent or do something drastic to cool off, I settled for ice cream

When it was over and I started getting a tummy ache, I realised the folly of my action

I was even too ashamed to work out and jump off what I had consumed

So I fell into a shallow darkness (shallow because I slapped myself out of it) and it made me think about how we ‘act out’ and generally misbehave while blaming our lack of self-control on -“I had a bad day!, “I’m depressed”, “Ï am already fat so why try?”,  “I’m ill so let me just indulge today”, “I’m desperate and there is no time”, “It’s not my fault things are like this”, "people are so inconsiderate"- and then engage in baseless activities that can only beget feelings of shame and failure.

Well I’ve come to realize the hard way that it’s all a heap of horse manure when we indulge in things we know have negative consequences; when we go back to a habit we have been delivered from or generally express some form of bad behaviour because we’re upset: who told you that the universe and her inhabitants care that much about your bad day or life? That is not sufficient to make silly decisions that affect your progress and maybe selfishly affect others. 

Do you think we’ll understand why you yelled at a genuinely irritating potential client in a moment of frustration; why you threw that phone against the wall in the presence of people; why you broke that man’s side view mirror even though he deserved it and sometimes we even go as far as throwing caution to the wind and call that ridiculous person from your past because you’re bored or sad or you feel they would make you feel better……FOUL! You just opened the door for a domino effect of more horse manure!!

No excuses, if you’re having a bad day, suck it up! I don’t intend to be smooth and diplomatic, this is me talking to myself and anyone else who reads this; we already possess the strength to say NO to what would make us hang our heads a few minutes, hours or days’ time. We are not children who can get away with throwing an occasional tantrum, sulking or be pampered with candy when something unpleasant happens. This is real life and we’re expected to take responsibility – there MAY be exceptions but sometimes these exceptions become an upward review in dress size 6 or 9 months later, or that drunken text produced you a crown of friend with benefit or needing an AA meeting and that potential client you yelled at completely destroyed your reputation on Instagram or that person whose window you broke becomes your future in-law (extreme I know) but nothing is impossible here!

Just calm down! Seriously! Decide and carry out realistic steps to try solve whatever the problem is and if you need a break, develop some other healthy activity to distract you – Pray, sleep, eat an apple, sing, go dancing or walking, watch a movie, call a good old friend, call your mother, stay at the office and finish everybody’s assignment for them (Lol) ANYTHING BUT stupid behaviour you will regret later. All the Best!

By the way, I’m yet to fully recover from my fall but I don’t intend to be down any longer…..this post was my first point of liberation! And thank you for coming back after so long to read……. XOXO

Thursday, 30 April 2015

Teach your rug to fly

Out of the thousands of books I’ve read, one that I thoroughly enjoyed is ‘who moved my cheese’ by Spencer Johnson, I read it a few years ago during a training I attended, and though I learnt some lessons, I can say authoritatively that there are some things theory won’t teach you until you experience and learn first-hand.
My cheese has been moved a few times, to be honest I’ve woken up before and found that the whole station has been moved or demolished; what is so sad is that there were some instances when I saw this coming but I didn’t trust myself enough to make the right choice or I was too lazy or afraid of the unknown. I used to say ‘impatience’ when someone asked me to mention a character flaw/something about me I could change; and over time in an attempt to not be an impatient person I had become fearful and often accommodated or adapted to situations that though I knew were wrong, I’d tell myself to calm down and ‘learn lessons’, ‘live through it and come out stronger’, ‘put in more effort’, blah blah blah!
I looked back  few years of my life and realized I had often accepted much less than I deserved; not because I have a heightened sense of my own importance but because I now have a better knowledge of who I am and can be. I also recognize that I got too comfortable when the ‘cheese’ seemed sufficient so I was often left frustrated at every slight change or disruption in my routine
And in extreme cases when ‘the rug gets pulled from under you’ it is not pretty; you blame the whole world including your dead ancestors and haters, you give excuses and cook up all sorts of stories about how unlucky you are, it just so happens that this period you run into old friends from school who seem to have the perfect life while you 'Mr/Miss most likely to succeed’ is living to make ends meet and you fall in and out of depression and self-condemnation and how life is unfair.
……..I’m glad I can laugh and write about this now, because I’ve learnt the importance of teaching your rug to fly or at least being able to roll it up and run with it to the next point; we won’t always have control of things that happen to us but we can learn to control how we react to those things which at the end makes us better. None of us have been promised The Perfect Life but rather than sulk at every misfortune and be static, I am willing to be better; to get up and act when I need to and not sit down in anger or throwing pity parties.

** the image is of calvin and hobbes on their imaginary magic carpet; the dialogue is funny but made me think about how some people can still be hung on certain issues even after they have been blessed with the chance to move on

Friday, 10 April 2015

Don't wear a short dress to get a pedicure


I thoroughly enjoy getting a pedicure; I’m a feet typa girl and I catch myself looking at people’s feet and being worried that people judge mine too, Hehehehe! Issues right?
Anyway, on one of my frequent visits to my ‘nail lady’ I wore a dress that in all honesty cannot be considered short, that is until I had to sit down and raise my leg so she could do her thing……Errrrr…….how can we rectify this blunder as we’re not interested in being ‘revealed’? Without me voicing my thoughts, she got me a towel which was tiny and didn't really change the situation but her effort was much appreciated; I laughed at myself and made a mental reminder to wear only trouser like clothing whenever I’m going to get my feet done.
But while I sat in awkward positions and tugged at my dress and tiny towel, I couldn't help but criticize myself; I take pride in the fact that I always think of possible situations generally and even when getting dressed – I consider matters like comfort, decency, ability to run if a riot breaks out, how easy would it be to jump on a commercial motorcycle if I discover there is traffic and how high can I jump or stretch if I have to do a flying kick during a fight (yes such matters are vital) but this one day I wasn't prepared and it wasn't fun holding on to the edge of my dress hoping no man in the unisex salon was having a field day reducing my bride price.
Yes there is room for genuine omission and mistakes, still it made me realize that we humans can sometimes get too comfortable and make excuses like “well it’s just for today!” NO, it’s not just for today because “it’s just for today” could be your last day or your last chance or get you totally misunderstood.
If it is in your habit to always lock your car doors wherever you go, please always lock your doors; don’t one day in a lazy moment leave your car door unlocked because it would only take 5 minutes to go in and out of the store, you may just come out after 5 minutes and find you've been robbed.
I’m not trying to be pessimistic or extreme or claim accidents don’t happen, however if you've a pattern that has worked for you for years or if you constantly follow your gut in even seemingly minor things like what to eat, it’s not wrong to keep at it. I know people who don’t eat certain foods not prepared in their homes; the day you see it in a restaurant or party and because it looks yummy and clean you decide to try and then you spend the next 3 days on the toilet seat, who would you blame?

Habits and careful living patterns are not bad; routines are not boring if they keep you safe and at peace, no matter what anyone says about you being stiff, fearful, difficult etc. do what you have to, it’s fine…….it doesn't make you weird.

Thursday, 2 April 2015

Passion and Practice Pt III: Life

I couldn’t think of a ‘deep’ title for this post…..Lol!
So I simply called it “Life”.....which is something I've been thinking a lot about lately; why are we here? What are we supposed to do while we’re here? And why do we go through the things we do?
Trust me the questions don’t come as easily as I make it sound and it’s not so much a fun conversation to have but anyway, I’m grateful to be ‘here’
I like photography…..it hasn't been made known to me if it would be a profession however I thoroughly enjoy the art and idea of capturing emotions, history and events.
The pictures below were taken by me, I’m lazy and shy but I practice as often as I can. I was going through my folders and these are some of the pictures that ‘jumped at’ me……and I genuinely think they signify ‘life’ or ‘beginning’ or ‘existence’ in some way……I’ll let you have your opinion too…….
Enjoy!
They say Green is the color of life but when I see yellow flowers they signify life for me more than green does. Yellow flowers just…errrm…make me hopeful!

'Anticipating new life'……at a baby shower organized for a friend


I think this picture is a bit blurry blah blah but I love it! This is my friend’s introduction and she was being ushered out by friends and family to go meet her husband and in-laws…….the beginning of a new life! I love how everyone else seemed to be looking at her or something else and only she was smiling and looking forward.

I know how I felt when I took this picture, unfortunately I’m not sure how well to express myself…..it was beautiful, I was reminded of God’s awesomeness and ability to sustain EVERYTHING and then I was scared as I was in a boat and it’s not one of my favorite places to be.

I’m fascinated by sea shells- I don’t go to the beach often and when I do, I make sure I pick some – it’s amazing that they were once a covering for something that lived and died…….beautiful armor!

Death is a necessary part of life…………


***Happy Easter everyone! My genuine prayer for you is that you experience hope…..hope and faith that helps you live again; to resurrect dead dreams and your God-given aspirations and unwavering strength to stand firm!

Friday, 27 March 2015

Your win won’t always be their loss


Have you ever wanted so badly to revenge? To see someone who hurt you suffer for what they did to you? And you plan to give that great speech when you run into them or how your successful and glamorous life would make them be ashamed for hurting you or doubting your greatness
Well I’ve learnt that it doesn’t always happen that way and even sometimes when you feel like you’ve won, the person you were trying to get back at may not even be remotely aware they were in any type of contest with you……so painful!
There are very few things on earth that hurt like this; the day you wake up and realize some people got away with hurting you can feel like your last, Lol! I’m laughing at myself now because I can remember vividly one day a very short while ago when I experienced this truth……my feeling of victory and balloon of pride deflated in seconds and the heartache that followed can’t be described……someone, people, life had stolen a lot from me and karma stroke it off her record. To say I cried would be a gross understatement
It was unfair! It is unfair; they should suffer for what they did because you didn’t deserve the betrayal, mockery or theft! And it’s worse when these same people go ahead to thrive and succeed in life when all you want is to see them begging on the streets or simply want them to realize what great treasure they lost when they walked out on you
I know this feeling (and so have some other people I know); I blame myself because I try to be forgiving; not stupid but hopeful that though they’ve hurt me before, they may change and see my worth but they didn’t so I held on to false hope that they would pay for their wrongs which would be the perfect compensation for all I’ve suffered. Looking back now I realize that I saw warning signs but I unconsciously or stubbornly held on to such relationships longer than their death date because I was already hoping an opportunity to ‘show them’ would present itself but sadly that wasn’t to be as such wishes don’t come through…….you may never run into an ex the day you’re looking amazing and entwined with an equally HOT new partner; you may never see them cry after realizing their mistake and it may even be something as serious as you never carrying your own biological child even after people laugh at you for being barren.
In time and if you allow yourself, you’ll move past the hurt, you’ll know what to do and how to respond and there is a reward for not trying to take revenge into your own hands; sometimes all you get is Peace of mind but in due time you’ll realize that’s sufficient.

According to one of my favorite characters in a movie Juanita Sims, “Somebody almost got away with me in a plastic bag…!” Don’t give anyone that chance – to take who you are away from you and turn you bitter. Anger can be comforting; it gives a certain level of strength or numbness that allegedly makes it easy to hold a grudge or plot evil but believe me, it’s always pointless.

Yesterday was my birthday, and from about a week to the day all I could count were my losses including situations that I didn’t win. I asked God questions and condemned myself even more for being so weak; I was eventually reminded about how great my life is and how blessed I am to be celebrating life – some people didn’t live to see my age. I ended up having a great day and I believe that I don’t need to see someone feel like they lost to validate my right choices and assurance that I’m moving towards a better life!

XOXO


**I wish all Nigerians a peaceful election on March 28th; I pray for peace and joy for this nation, may everyone plotting evil be consumed by it and may the best man win.

Friday, 20 March 2015

Olivia Pope is a Liar


……….and so is Trey Songz
PLEASE! Men and women, there is no Love like the type Olivia and Fitzgerald claim to share. A lot of people believe if it doesn't cause you heart wrenching pain, take you on a wild emotional roller coaster, make you scream, wail, promise to set all humans ablaze until you are physically exhausted and doubt you can live life without the person then it is not true love! Love shouldn't feel like a continuous heart attack please.
This is why a lady will watch a man she is dating, marry another woman but he still comes back to her claiming she is the one he loves and needs so she settles for 2nd place and even though he treats her like number 1, it doesn't change her status to ‘Mrs’ and she is left being loyal to nothing; and yet the one he doesn’t love produces child after child while you agree to abort the child ‘conceived by mistake’ because it would be “controversial to have a child with her now and what would people say?” Is that righttt?
Love is NOT that hard, dramatic or volatile! It’s not a concept or stray idea you can manipulate or claim to innovate to suit society’s imaginations. Fitzgerald doesn’t love Olivia Pope (neither does she love him) and just because they have been hooked on each other for years doesn’t mean women out there should hold on to hope that the man they love ‘would come home’ Wake up Darling! Writers have got you all twisted around their imaginative fingers and while your lives get ruined, they get more cash in the bank.
This isn’t about the women alone, when you hear or experience some cases and you can’t help but wonder if the man is bound by a spell. 
Because you’ve known each other for years, the sex is great, you’re comfortable with each other, you hang out sometimes and you think alike doesn’t mean ZIT if there are many other things wrong. It may have worked for some couples but are they happy? And do you think it is ok to agree to a forever with someone you’ve given everything and gives you nothing back? And you have your heart in your mouth every time because you fear they can get up and walk away from you and your life will be all over.
Like I always say, I don’t have all the answers and I would never claim not to have been stupid in the past about what I thought love was however I choose not to be ignorant anymore and neither should you. Stop giving people power they don’t deserve and don’t let them spoil your heart till it’s dark, bitter and unable to see the good in the world. If you don’t have a faith that guides you on what true love is then use your common sense and see that SAY YOU LOVE ME + TREAT ME BADLY (consistently causing me pain)= YOU DON’T LOVE ME

C’ est fini!

Friday, 13 March 2015

Stillborn


It was first a thought,
A simple question “what if I brought forth?”
No confidence or certainty, but an ordinary wandering thought
Then days, weeks, months and the simple question took root
The feeling wouldn’t go away and everything in the universe seemed to align with your thoughts
Then you think “maybe I should do this, maybe I can do this, maybe this is what I was created to do!”
So you start asking questions, learning what you can even if you know you can never be fully prepared
You are scared, unsure but you share your plan with a few trusted people
You get mixed responses “Are you ready?”  “Can you do this?” “Wait a few more years!” “Go for it, I wonder what you’ve been waiting for!”  “’ll help you; just do what you need to!”
You tell yourself “you can never really know until you try”
So you conceive! The process of planting the seed was nerve wracking but you did it
And it was exciting seeing signs of change; Facing challenges, getting excited, waking up moody and would just rather stay in bed than face the day yet your heart swells with love and pride
Learning, crying, fighting the voice of reason when you are about to splurge your savings on things you know you can do without but you feel would be a perfect fit
……….then over time the ride of emotions become one straight path of pain
Constant discomfort and exhaustion and you just can’t keep anything going
You struggle through the weeks and months, telling yourself it’s just a bad phase that will pass
“Nothing good comes easy” is your mantra as you drag yourself through every experience
And one day you are left standing over your own blood, sweat, tears and wasted time
As you hold a stillborn in your hands and wonder “Is this really what I wanted?”
“Maybe I heard wrong!” “I gave everything so why did this happen to me?” “I had good intentions and I was diligent with my gift so what wrong turn did I take?”
And your heart breaks; for ‘it’ was deprived a chance to grow, to bring someone else relief or happiness
So you fall into darkness; losing your joy, strength and self-worth
Not able to forgive yourself and face the world
And without knowing where your answer will come, you ask “Would I ever recover from this?”


Burying a child, a dream, a business or a marriage is hard!
I’ll never know the answer to how you’ll remain whole after you’ve put all you are in something that failed, but I’ve experienced hope and I know in time you can get up. The root may spring forth another tree or may stay a stump forever but regardless no loss will kill you.

**The image is of 3 books I bought a few years ago, they represented my dream, my baby. For millions of reasons that I couldn’t handle, I succumbed to a funeral……..however it’s time for Resurrection  ; )

Friday, 6 March 2015

Light took out the Darkness


I’ve learnt so much in the past few weeks, it’s almost hard to keep up because I don’t want to hear and forget and I don’t want to have so much good going through my mind that I would now eventually end up with nothing.
God floored me often, sometimes to save me from my stupid stubborn self and other times just to remind me that HE is the one in control. At first it felt like an attack; too much was coming at me at the same time and I seemed to fail at everything. But in time light got shed on things, and I accepted the need to take responsibility, to desire a fixed heart, renewed mind and understand that it is growth.
I don’t have a creative or artistic way to share my lessons so I’m just going to highlight things (in no particular order) that stood out either for the first time or I was reminded…….
  • Most of the time, what we do is wishing and not planning (and even planning needs following action). Nobody hands over red velvet cupcakes to you on the streets with Oreo shakes, if you want those, get into your car (or a bus or taxi) that should have fuel, drive to the shops, bring out your hard earned money, pay for and enjoy these delicacies, then deal with the consequences! It’s not about wishing, it’s a simple calculated process of going forward to get what you want; some of us spend time wishing for a free meal and because we get disappointed so often we begin to blame every other situation and person for our self-inflicted misfortunes when we should have simply got up to either ask for help if we genuinely don’t have (as others can’t read our minds) or gone to get what we need.
  • Nobody teaches us how to heal from heartbreak or disappointments; it’s not something that was taught in school and our parents or those in authority over us don’t talk to us about it because it is awkward and sometimes they also haven’t healed from their own past hurt and really you can’t teach what you don’t know.
  • Good intentions are not enough to get results – people can’t work with what we keep in our mind or what we say, it’s about what they see us do. Also telling yourself you’ve good intentions won’t move the universe to action…..your faith, consistent positive thoughts and right actions make things align and make others want to run with your vision.
  • Good friends won’t always be good – and this is due to different reasons- but don’t let it make you bitter.
  • People will forget you and move on and this is because I don’t think there is anyone who can't live without you and you can’t live without.
  • Self-motivation is a daily battle, (even the seemingly effortless task of accomplishing a to-do list can make you feel like such a failure at the end of the day, week and month) especially when you feel there is nothing to look forward to; I don’t know the winning strategy, but you have to keep fighting daily. In battle scenes in movies, no one ever lay down on the ground because they were tired, they would either get trampled upon or killed, everyone fought till a man, group or nation killed or conquered the opponent regardless of how long it lasted. This is what being an adult is about, it is a WAR folks!
  • We’re afraid to really take the leap of faith, to go all out and do what we really think we were created for or we will be good at. This is often because we are scared we will fail or we are scared we will succeed and then not have the strength to remain consistent; once you do good or great then you need to continue at that pace and higher…….and it never gets easier but it becomes worth it.
  • “Be faithful in little” is not a cliché; you need to learn how to be faithful and dependable at various levels. And build your capacity, go beyond your self- imposed limits because truly only those with strong unwavering will power conquer.
  • Pain is a good teacher; going through certain trials makes you humble and teachable. I read something years ago “Don’t ask for lighter load, pray for a stronger back” so that’s what I do now and I often come through rough times a better person.
  • People are bad with money and integrity isn’t an important value for many; it’s unfortunate and painful but people will continually be unreasonable. It’s either you develop some mechanism that’s convenient for you or just become the person who doesn’t joke with money……like people know if they owe you money they are going to prison or something drastic! Hahahaha!
  • Being good pays off, eventually. Just be a good person, no matter what or how it makes you feel or how people take you for granted, REMAIN A GOOD PERSON because being badly behaved is not in your character and you will never be satisfied or happy when acting out or being someone else. And haven’t you noticed how the one time you choose to act out of character you get into more trouble than the person who is badly behaved every day?
  • After a while or at a certain age, you can no longer blame your family and friends (or lack of them) for your misfortunes. You need to tell yourself the truth and stop living in a picture you painted that may even have faded; if you ask someone who has been angry for years why they are holding a grudge, he/she may not even remember the main event, all they hold on to is that ‘feeling of offense’ but it’s time to let it go. Sometimes people who hurt you have moved past the whole ordeal; stop holding on to the title of VICTIM, it comes with no rewards.
  • It is ridiculously hard (yet POSSIBLE) to forgive yourself- repeated acts or experiences that cause feelings of shame or disappointments can leave you hard and low. It also doesn't help that when you try to heal and move on, your memory and imagination that often failed you in the classroom suddenly goes into over drive, showing you millions of past or hypothetical images. But it is possible to heal, not suppress feelings or use substitutes but to be made whole and not live haunted………it starts with desiring it and believing you’re worth good.

                                                               
My heartfelt prayer for everyone who reads this is that you experience genuine happiness in this year, that you remain hopeful in the face of whatever adversity, that your heart stays pure and untainted by hurt, that you never wish you were someone else and that you break free from any and every type of limitation in order to accomplish your goals.

XOXO

Tuesday, 3 March 2015

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Happy New Year, Happy New Month!
I know right……how irresponsible of me after how many months to open my mouth and say that.
But I apologize, look upon my face and have mercy…….I’m mortal and not always such a god as I claim.
The past weeks have been eventful and I’ve chosen to pick my lessons and forge ahead. I shall be sharing in the coming weeks but for now……..enjoy being alive and the gift of having access to a technology device to read this!!!

XOXO